Say ‘no thank you’ out loud to yourself in the car, in front of the mirror, in the shower. This will help you build these words into your muscle memory.
Here are a few variations to practice:
Thanks for thinking of me. I can’t right now/I can’t make it/I can’t attend.
I’m at capacity right now, so I will decline. Thanks for understanding.
No, not at this time.
2. Keep it simple
Resist the temptation to over-explain your reasons for saying no. Keep your response simple and clear.
3. Delay if you’re unsure
If your knee-jerk reaction is to say yes immediately, respond with: “can I get back to you?”.
4. Be gracious
Rejection is always much easier to handle when it’s clear the person saying it has no bad feelings.
A friendly smile and simple ‘thank you’ can make a world of difference – it shows the other party that you appreciate their offer and helps to smooth over any negative feelings.
5. Offer an alternative (if you want)
Maybe you like the person or their idea, but you can’t make it that day – or you like the day and the person, but not the event. Suggest catching up some other time or doing something else.
6. Practice kind self-talk
Remind yourself it’s perfectly OK to say no. You have a right to protect your wellbeing and live according to your values.
Thank you so much for thinking of me. While I appreciate the opportunity, I'm afraid I won't be able to take on [the task/project/event] at this time. I'm honored that you would consider me for [the opportunity].
“I'm not comfortable with that, but I appreciate the offer.” (Honest and polite.) “I can't commit to that right now, but I'll think about it.” (Non-committal but not entirely closed off.) “I'm committed to another project with a tight deadline. Perhaps next time?” (Specific and leaves future opportunities open.)
These include keeping it brief, being clear, and being honest. There are some different ways to say “no”. These include the direct no, the enquiring no, the raincheck no, the reasoned no, and the broken record no.
“I'm not comfortable with that, but I appreciate the offer.” (Honest and polite.) “I can't commit to that right now, but I'll think about it.” (Non-committal but not entirely closed off.) “I'm committed to another project with a tight deadline. Perhaps next time?” (Specific and leaves future opportunities open.)
Introduction: My name is Francesca Jacobs Ret, I am a innocent, super, beautiful, charming, lucky, gentle, clever person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you.
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